This morning I asked my colleagues around the office to keep a note every time they came across a reference to the word "offended", "offensive" or "offence" in today's newspapers and news websites. We had a quick round-up after lunchtime and found 21, without even trying. It seems that every social grouping (religious and cultural groups, for example) now believe that they have a right NOT to be offended, and I suspect that this has been largely cultivated by the media. Where on earth did this come from?

Naturally I believe that everyone has the right to go about his or her business free from threat and that all humans are equal. No one should suffer as a result of a differentiating characteristic that they cannot help. Gender, race, skin colour and orientation are some obvious examples but of course, there are others.

But a democratic, diverse and changing society depends upon lively and honest debate. A free society depends on the right to free speech, the liberty to express an opinion however distasteful it may appear to some people. Individuals who choose a specific way of life (religious practice is a good example) must recognise that there are others who do not share their unquestioning acceptance of a belief system, possibly judging instead that religions are man-made structures used by men who seek the power to govern others.

Rather than “taking offence” or responding to criticism with vitriolic rhetoric, I would love to hear religious leaders and followers explain why they feel that their way of life is the definitively “right” path, why they believe that their religion is “true”, and perhaps even offer some tangible evidence.

In fact, many religious people are content to pursue their way of life with quiet dignity, satisfied that their way is the right way and that it is outsiders who are missing out. Even those who proselytise will often do so in a persuasive but gentle way. True religious extremists are few and far between and their passion is often associated with other political, social or personal factors. These are the individuals that react so vehemently to any comment that they can construe as a slur against them, how ever distorted their interpretation might be.

As a fair and equal society, we cannot run and hide when bigots of any persuasion try to stop us from speaking our minds. As the ordinary people who helped to defeat Oswald Mosley’s fascists at Cable Street some 70 years ago were prepared to stand up for freedom, we must respond to the need for free discussion by refusing to be bullied into silence. If we feel that a particular practice or tradition is detrimental to our community or society as a whole then we must say so, sensibly and calmly.

One of our biggest challenges is that people have literally lost touch with what constitutes abuse or offensive behaviour nowadays. The term “racism” is banded around so freely that people just don’t know what it means anymore and, for safety’s sake, are inclined to avoid talking about racial issues at all. How on earth can this be good for society, when we can only become closer through understanding each others’ issues and feelings?

We must learn that it is right to question and criticise the behaviour of anyone we want to, and they have a full right to reply and to justify their actions should they wish to – and we must listen. We can learn from each other this way. Minorities should not be too thin-skinned, and should be ready to stand up for their way of life by helping others to understand it, not just by demanding this thing called “respect”.